Step 1. Receive expensive Scotch as a gift.
Step 2. Drink it over time.
Step 3. Keep the bottle.
Step 4. Buy cheap supermarket whiskey and pour it into the fancy bottle.
Step 5. Serve it at a friends’ gathering without saying a word.
Step 6. Sit back and enjoy your smug self as they all admire the flavor, praise the superb oak undertones or even a slight chocolate note, are delighted with its supposed smoothness and all agree that, although super expensive, it is worth its price.
Step 7 (optional). Giggle a little.
Ladies and gentlemen, my father.
One of the biggest disappointments of my life is probably still the moment of realization as a kid, that Vengaboys were singing about going to Ibiza, not “We’re going to eat pizza”.
15yo me: *avoids calls from parents as much as possible*
31yo me: Hiiiiiii! It’s me! Why am I calling? Yes, I know it’s 8am on a weekend. Omg, have you seen the funny pic I sent you? Mom, are you there? Mom?!
Work friend’s son is 2 years old.
– He has those little phases. Right now he’s really into body parts. Especially his penis. He’ll take off his clothes and be like “Here’s willy!”
– *understandingly* I know guys like that…
It slightly disturbs me when professional contacts unexpectedly try to be really friendly. Suddenly in email signatures Roberto becomes Rob, Florian turns into Flo, and Andreas is now Andy.
On the other hand, I wonder how far I can push that.